In Between

Every day of life has the ”in-between moments”.

You know…

The time between having done

And having to do again.

The moments of the day after things have ended and you anticipate the next.

Like after the bus leaves in the morning, but before the kids get home

Or after dinner but before bed

After the kids go to bed, and before they wake up.

During these in-between moments of my day I am usually wanting to fast forward to the next thing going on.

After the hustle of getting the kids ready for school and watching the bus pull away from our house; I find myself somewhat preparing and even looking forward to their return.

And then when they are actually home with the TV on and the demands for my time and attention start; I inevitably wish I could fast forward to bedtime when the house gets quiet and I am left with a little “me time”

I was thinking yesterday of the “In-between moment” I find myself in now.

I am waiting for our new baby to arrive.

Nine months of waiting, and it comes down to this.

We are all getting impatient.

Even now as I write this post;
a contraction (false or real who knows...) travels down my lower back and I give an intolerant sigh.

I fight the deeply-felt urge to have the relief of “being done.”

In the past I usually want to be on the other side of pregnancy.

To be done with the pain, and the labor process and just have the little baby in my arms already.

But this time as I sense this is my last time being pregnant;

I am trying desperately to hold on to these last in-between moments with this baby.

When Brett was just little I couldn’t wait for him to talk, or walk or ride a bike, or eat solids etc.

I kept looking forward with anticipation for him to reach his next milestone.

Now here he is at fourteen – shaving the “peach fuzz” on his upper lip, picking out his own clothes and combing his own hair, asking to drive every time we get in the car together, and making himself two ham sandwiches for his afterschool “snack.”

Where did all those “in-between moments” of his fourteen years go?

Probably I was caught up with inconsequesntial things.

But here I am again...40 weeks pregnant. For the seventh time.

Today I am trying to savor the uncomfortable nights...

the awkward and round size of my belly...

the super- unflattering clothes...

the ice-crunching and dirt craving (yes, I am going to admit that)

the doctor visits, the heartburn, the swollen feet...

and the alien-like kicks and jabs of the baby moving around in my belly.

I don’t want any of it to end.

And just now… Quincy walks up to me and slaps my belly and says “baby!”

Emotion washes over me.

I need to take a deep breath and realize that there is a time and a season for everything.

And now the “in-between moments” of this day are getting away from me,
...it’s almost time to start dinner and I am already looking forward to saying "goodnight" and sitting on my bed chomping ice and having "me time."